Posts Tagged ‘dark mother’

empress

from the Bohemian Gothic Tarot:  “The Empress: Motherhood and maturity.  All things natural.  The cycle of birth, growth, death, and rebirth.  Being at one with nature.

shadow meaning: Acceptance that death, as well as birth, is part of the entire natural cycle. Trying to control nature.  Poor, uncaring parenting.”

The Empress.  The Earth, and Dark Mother.

As a new parent one might spend time lurking at boards, picking up tips here and there.  Baby having trouble getting out those dastardly burps?  fennel tea!  And one might pay closer attention to oft- parroted sayings.

My children are my life!”

Normally this would go in one of my ears and straight out the other.  But now it stayed and vexed and I was left wondering why.  Surely, this was a loving, innocent statement.  Nothing to brew about.  And it’s certainly not my beeswax if others think this way.

But as I pondered the statement further, I realized I just didn’t like the implications (real or imagined) behind the words.  Because, no.  He’s not.  I had my own life before him, and continue to now.  My dreams and desires and pursuits continue.  He is the most amazing, awesome, joyful part of my life.  He’s the whipped cream and cherry on top the sundae.  But we are separate entities.  Never do I want to be the kind of person who lives vicariously through their child. That wouldn’t be fair to me.  Nor to him.  He is an autonomous being and he has the right to his own dreams and desires and pursuits.  And yes, the right to his own mistakes and failings, too.